Dad played hymns. Mom played country. And for the first thirteen years of my life, those were the only two types of music I heard. Neither of my parents are musically inclined, and I only remember them occasionally listening to songs as they did chores. Music wasn’t a notable feature of our household. Of course, my sister changed that as soon as she reached her teenage years. Now you can walk into my parent’s house at almost any time, listen closely, and catch the strains of One Direction or Hamilton playing in the background. But I was the oldest. The guinea pig. And as I didn’t show any interest, my parents didn’t include music in their great child-raising experiment. So I grew up thinking of music solely as hymns and country. Until age 13, when I stumbled upon the music of Andrew Peterson. Which really, really confused me, because it didn’t fit neatly into either of those categories. I soon came to absolutely love Andrew Peterson’s music, and I still do today. (You might remember that in an earlier song spam I introduced a song by his daughter, Skye, who is also a phenomenal musician) My favorite song in the bygone days of my youth was ‘You’ll Find Your Way’. It resonated with me more than any song I’d ever heard before— because it’s addressed to a young boy on the cusp of adulthood, the very situation I found myself in. https://youtu.be/NMn3ThuvGMo -Zachary Holbrook
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I like words. Well… you probably could’ve guessed that, as you know that I’m a writer. But when it comes to songs that I listen to for my own personal enjoyment, I place a higher value on the words than the music. Most of all, I like songs that tell a story. And not just any story, but a story with change and progression. And so I’m really happy that I stumbled upon Joanna Newsom’s ‘Emily’, a song that tells a wonderfully in-depth story through sweeping and beautiful lyrics. This song stands out in several ways: it’s 12 minutes long. It expanded my vocabulary. (If you don’t know what an ‘asterism’ is, look it up, then listen to this song). It bursts with incredible imagery. It’s the kind of song I would aspire to write, if I wrote music instead of books. I listened to it every day for a week when I first discovered it. Usually several times a day. Then I sang along at the top of my lungs while I cleaned the kitchen. It’s delightful, and I look forward to listening to it again and again. A bit of backstory: ‘Emily’ is about the singer’s sister, an astrophysicist who crossed the world to work at observatories in Argentina and New Zealand. With that in mind, go listen to it: https://youtu.be/D1lBOA_8OZ0 (Seriously. It’s amazing). -Zachary Holbrook For me, music serves as an emotional warehouse, capturing my feelings at a particular moment and storing them. When a song becomes associated with a person, or place, or time in my life, listening to that song brings up those memories even years later. This happens even when the content of the song itself has nothing whatsoever to do with those memories.
Example: ‘Red’ by Taylor Swift. The lyrics are word candy, and the music is delightfully energetic. (Last week, after eating a sumptuous lunch and then driving an hour in the warm summer sun, I felt myself starting to nod off… so I rolled my windows down, turned on ‘Red’ full-blast, and sang along. It worked.) But that’s not the reason I like the song. The main reason I enjoy listening to ‘Red’ is because it reminds me of my friend Olivia. You see, Olivia really likes Taylor Swift, and ‘Red’ is one of her favorites. It’s become one of a handful of songs that reminds of a specific person in my life. Because of my connection to Olivia, I value ‘Red’ in a way that has nothing to do with the song itself. (‘Red’ also provides great fodder for philosophical discussions. Just try comparing Swift’s use of similes to Homer’s in ‘The Iliad’, or use Plato’s exploration of knowledge in ‘Theaetetus’ to think about what it would mean to ‘know someone you’ve never met’) https://youtu.be/34Kql5L5eeE -Zachary Holbrook Sometimes the most challenging part of challenging times comes after they end. When I face a crisis, God makes Himself known to me in new ways. It’s easy to see the transformation underway— both in myself and in the world around me. Intense suffering begets intense growth. I’ve had mountaintop spiritual experiences. Moments when the difficulties ahead seem overwhelming, but I’m able to rest in God and place childlike trust in Him. And also moments that seem like the climax of an Avengers film— you know, that scene where the forces of darkness are running rampant, and heroes rises up to resist them. Those are the moments when it feels like God claps me on the shoulder and sends me out into the world to complete His work, and I’m confident because I know He’s prepared me in every way I could possibly need. But those moments end. The crisis winds down. The forces of darkness retreat (for a time). Peace and stability reign. And then I have to figure out how to do ordinary life again. Movies skip over these parts. But I live every second— eating, sleeping, cleaning, playing games with my brother, figuring out how to make money so I can eat in the future, and a hundred other mundane activities. It can be a bit of letdown, really. And that’s why I’m glad to share this song with you today. It’s about trusting God in ordinary life, after the intense spiritual experiences have faded. It’s about remembering that He’s always present, whether you’re in the middle of a battle or sitting beneath the shade of an oak tree on a languid summer afternoon. The song is called ‘Guessing Games’, by Skye Peterson. Here it is: https://youtu.be/d-ftv1WTKlQ -Zachary Holbrook For this week’s Song Spam Saturday, I’m taking a break from sharing personal stories about songs that have been deeply meaningful to me, and instead I’m sharing with you something fun. ‘El Grillo’ is a lively tune by one of the most famous composers of the 15th century, Josquin de Prez. Even though it’s written for a choir during the Renaissance, it sounds nothing like the soaring church music typically associated with that period. Instead, it’s fast-paced and catchy. So catchy, in fact, after my freshman class learned about this piece in Music, some of the sophomores started singing it while running around the kitchen, even though a full year had passed since they’d listened to it for their own music class. Here it is: https://youtu.be/OI-bQ0RkArA The lyrics are in Italian, and you probably don’t speak Italian, so you may be wondering… what is this song about? Well, ‘grillo’ means ‘cricket’, and the song compares the song of a cricket to the song of a bird. Although birds are typically thought of as more beautiful musicians, Josquin points out that they stop singing during the heat of the day, whereas the cricket endures. He ends with the line “the cricket sings alone for love.” The song has been the subject of much analysis in the 500 or so years since its publication. As I found out in music class last fall, many music historians interpret it as a metaphor for romantic love: perseverance and fidelity (i.e song of the cricket) are more valuable than sweet but quickly fading promises (i.e song of the birds). In short: it’s a catchy love song. Kind of like if Taylor Swift had lived during the Renaissance. I hope you enjoy it. -Zachary Holbrook I faced my first-ever finals week as a college student with an unusual problem. I had several major essays and a video project due— which I’d already completed. I had a big test for Music class coming up— which I’d already studied for. I had nothing to do. Most people would think of this as a good thing. But at the time, when I was already in emotional turmoil for various other reasons, it was kind of devastating. I was lonely— all my friends were busy cramming for finals. I knew they were going through a challenging time and wanted to participate in it alongside them, but I couldn’t. Because I was different from every other student. I realized I had an unusual gift. I wrote an essay in four hours that my roommate needed four days to complete. But this ability left me feeling out of place in the school community, because I was unable to feel the same pressure and intensity that everyone else was feeling. I also felt excluded from the tremendous sense of relief and victory that appeared once finals ended. My classmates and I had all completed the same tasks, but they’d had to climb a mountain. I’d gone for a walk in the park. I managed to make myself feel isolated. And even though my feelings were out-of-touch with reality, as my friends all continued to love and accept me, it was a troubling time all the same. Over Christmas break, I wondered if I really belonged at college, or if I ought to focus my time and energy on completing some more important task. I could never identify what exactly the ‘more important task’ was that I should be doing, but surely I was wasting my time by pursuing a liberal arts degree at a nearly-unknown school In the midst of all these thoughts, I kept listening to this song. It’s called ‘Tug of War’, by Juli Strawbridge. https://youtu.be/74HJaPaVjNE ’Tug of War’ resonated with me in a special way. You see, Juli Strawbridge is a graduate of my college, and she wrote this song for her friend and fellow student Ethan, who had become my good friend as well. And I thought, “well, if someone else could feel the same uncertainty I feel, in a very similar situation, and come to peace with that, maybe I can too.” And so, after spending Christmas break with my family in California and seriously considering dropping out of college, I decided instead to get on a plane back to Tennessee and give it another chance. That’s how ‘Tug of War’, in addition to being one of my favorite songs ever, became one big reason I ended up spending the last five months in Tennessee. And I’m glad I did. A lot happened— including mold, snow, COVID, and my roommate forgetting to cook for months on end. But if you want those stories, you’ll have to come to Tennessee and talk with me and my classmates in person. The important thing is that I got a lot better at accepting my unique gifts, and even procrastinated a little bit so I’d have some work to do as finals approached. Everything turned out well. In August of 2019, I received the incredible blessing of serving at a wedding. The bride was my high school teacher, and she was fulfilling her dream of having her students play a vital role in the ceremony. Together with my classmates, I set up tables, welcomed guests, and prepared food. That night provided a tiny glimpse of God’s kingdom on earth. Simple beauty abounded— from the venue in the forest to the elegant arrangement of Costco’s rotisserie chicken as we served it on wooden platters. And in the midst of all that joyful service, I heard a song, a wedding gift written for the bride and groom. It’s called “Beauty in Our Eyes”, and even two years later it remains one of my favorite songs of all time. I wanted to share it with you today: https://youtu.be/EDHXJcloowY It’s rich in appreciation of the goodness God offers. I hope you’ll enjoy it. |
Progress on Doombear, Rough draft:10%
Progress on The Lore of Yore, third draft:
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"In truth, by leaving, I was seeking only one thing. A journey."
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